Movie Rankings: 2002, 2001, 2000

2002.

10. SIGNS. This is still my favorite M. Night movie.  It had a solid moving story, it was legitimately scary, and the ending was great.

9. TREASURE PLANET. Highly underrated Disney classic with gorgeous animation and design.

8. LILO AND SITCH.  Stitch is probably my favorite Disney character.

7. BLADE II. The first movie was a shocking surprise just for being a watchable comic book movie, the first ever, but the sequel blows it out of the water thanks to Guillermo Del Toro.  Everything about this movie works!

6. STAR TREK NEMESIS.  I actually like this movie!  It’s got a solid villain and some cinematic action sequences, which is more than can be said for most Trek movies.  I think it’s unfairly vilified.

5. SPIDER-MAN.  Unpopular opinion: this movie is good but not great.  Tobey is not my favorite Spidey, he barely cracks jokes in the suit, the Green Goblin Power Ranger looks dumb, and way too much time is spent on the origin story.

4. HARRY POTTER CHAMBER SECRETS. This movie had much more plot, action, and drama than the first movie, which was mostly a series of character introductions and classroom scenes.  It’s still unnecessarily long, however.

3. MINORITY REPORT.  This is mostly a perfect movie with astonishing concepts, visuals, and action scenes.  Spielberg at his best.  It only falters with the final act.  A fascinating vision of the future.

2. STAR WARS ATTACK OF THE CLONES.  Oh, how it pains me to list a Star Wars movie in second place!  I actually do like this movie more than most.  While the Anakin/Padme romance is very bad, everything else is great.  This is a better movie than TPM in a lot of ways.  The action scenes are absolutely iconic; Coruscant speeder chase!  Asteroid field chase!  Obi vs. Jango!  Battle of Geonosis!  Yoda vs. Dooku!  The overuse of CGI does look pretty dodgy by modern day standards unfortunately.

1. TWO TOWERS.  Star Wars is my first love, but LOTR is a very close second.  FOTR was a deeply meaningful movie for me, seeing my beloved book on film for the first time, and this just deepened that love with major battle sequences the first film lacked.

2001.

10. JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK.  Clerks is the best Kevin Smith, but this one is the most fun.  A hilarious crossover melding together all four previous movies.

9. JURASSIC PARK III.  Oh, what a disappointment after the first two!  It’s not a bad movie, but it’s just a small-scale story following a handful of people with none of the scope or meaning of the previous films.

8. TOMB RAIDER.  The first ever good video game movie!  It’s actually fun!

7. BLACK HAWK DOWN.  A classic and realistic war is hell movie.

6. ATLANTIS LOST EMPIRE.  One of the most underrated Disney films ever.  Atlantis is my all time favorite myth and the Mignolia art design was gorgeous.  I love this movie!

5. HARRY POTTER 1.  It’s one of my all time favorite franchises but the first movie is glacially slow.  It’s a series of character introductions and schoolroom scenes.

4. MONSTERS INC. One of Pixar’s best.  I particularly love how the entire thing is a metaphor for the oil crisis.

3. OCEAN’S ELEVEN.  A perfect movie of intricate plotting, twists, style, humor, character, and celebrity.  

2. THE MUMMY RETURNS.  I think this is almost as good as the original.  Even the annoying little kid works.

1. FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING.  The movie I have seen the most times in a theater in my life.  My favorite childhood book on the screen for the first time.  Pure magic.

2000.

10. CROUCHING TIGER. I haven’t seen this in decades but I remember it being amazing.

9. GLADIATOR. A great realistic history lesson in addition to a thrilling revenge story.

8. SCREAM 3. I recall this being a good ending to the trilogy.

7. SHANGHAI NOON. The first movie was just ok but I remember this being a legimately fun action comedy.

6. EMPEROR’S NEW GROOVE. A hilarious Disney classic.

5. PITCH BLACK.  A wonderful original sci-fi horror adventure that gave the world Vin Diesel.

4. TITAN AE. I love this movie!  Great underappreciated!

3. CHARLIE’S ANGELS. An incredibly fun action romp with truly great action scenes.

2. X-MEN. A crowning achievement as the first good comic book movie (not counting Blade which doesn’t look like a comic).

1. O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU. This is still my favorite Cohen Brothers movie.  It is a perfect combination of hilarious comedy, period piece drama, one of the best soundtracks ever, Clooney’s best performance, an adaptation of the Odyssey, and a showdown with the devil.

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